There are many definitions of clutter. I tend to think of anything that doesn’t have a place or a purpose in my home as clutter. Others think of clutter as possessions that are disorganized and accumulate around living areas. Some people think of clutter as categories of things. For example, they see clutter as paper, spiritual, emotional, and digital clutter. There are links between physical and emotional clutter, and the two can ping off one another. In fact, failure to address one part of this type of clutter can wreak havoc on another.

As discussed in an earlier blog, clutter can make us feel stressed, anxious, and depressed. In fact, research shows that when we have clutter in our lives, it can increase our cortisol levels, the “stress hormone.” Living in constant clutter can make us feel like we are under unrelenting assault.

The question is, where does clutter come from?  

The underlying thought is often that clutter comes from indecision. We have stuff all around our homes because we haven’t decided where to put the things we own. And, we have clutter in our lives because we haven’t taken control and decided what our basic values are, and what is truly important to us. When we can’t or don’t make decisions, we end up with lots of stuff we don’t need. I think this is true.

Clutter is anything that doesn’t belong in a space either because it belongs elsewhere in your home, or it doesn’t belong in your home any longer.

If you know what your goals and life priorities are, and your home reflects those goals and objectives, then everything that doesn’t have a place is just clutter. Plain and simple. So, when you declutter, you know what you have and what is important to keep. When you can define clutter, decluttering is that much easier.

What are some examples of physical clutter? 

Physical clutter can take the form of items that are broken, no longer used, or need to go. Plain and simple. They can be items that are not properly placed in your home. And they can be items that you need to return to their rightful owners. People leave things at our homes, and it then becomes our clutter. Return what is not yours.

What are some examples of emotional or mental clutter?

Mental and emotional clutter can take the form of people whose energy does not match ours. For example, people who bring us down. People who are more of a hassle than help. Routines that no longer work for us are emotional and mental clutter. And, finally, anything that takes up headspace is clutter. Get a pad of paper and write down what’s swirling around in your head. This frees up space to focus on the things that are truly important.

Decluttering, then, is the process of letting go.

Decluttering is the actual physical work that goes into letting go. There are a lot of professional organizers who can help you decide what to keep and what to discard. And there are a lot of techniques for making decisions on your own. Sometimes it’s important to bring in a professional organizer to help, and other times you can do it yourself. One thing to remember is that there will be emotions that come up during the decluttering process, and that’s okay. Sometimes we become anxious. Sometimes we become sad at the thought of lost possibilities. Sometimes we just feel overwhelmed. Whatever comes up during the decluttering process needs to be processed. Working through things one at a time can help to put your life in order. It’s an important concept to understand.

When we walk into a client’s home, and work with them to declutter their spaces, we tread lightly. Sometimes there is anger that comes up, and it may be directed inward. Or it may be directed outward at a spouse, for example, when he or she takes up space that crowds his or her partner. We have witnessed this frustration, and it is completely normal. In fact, what we find is that people store a lot of emotions in their excess things and letting go can be a hard, but freeing process.

A lot of unresolved emotions show up in clutter.

As an example, a woman whose home we helped declutter wanted us to go through her items, especially the sentimental ones. We helped group her items, but we explained to her that these items had meaning to her, and she needed to make the decision of what to keep and what to discard. Many of the items were things from her relationship with her mother, and she felt angry. She cried. She threw a fit over certain sentimental items because she had unresolved emotions. And she felt guilt for wanting to let them go.

As a solution to this situation, we explained that the best person to declutter her sentimental items with was her mother. After a lot of discussion, she finally agreed to call her and ask for help. Together, the two of them sorted through all the important, sentimental items that were causing our client to feel frustrated and upset. With her mother at her side, they discussed which items to keep, cried together, and talked about their emotions. This solution was one that increased their bonding experience, and helped both resolve emotions that were unspoken. Emotions had lingered for years, and they both felt relief at being able to express themselves. It was their trinkets and cards that led them to a better place in their relationship.

The heaviness of clutter.

Decluttering does feel heavy, especially when you are decluttering items that have not been addressed in years. Maybe it’s clothing. Maybe it’s a hobby that was never pursued. Maybe it’s the loss of years. Whatever the issue, decluttering helps us to process unresolved emotions and lets us become free of them. Once this process starts, it’s often easy to see what in life is holding us back. The decluttering process of letting go of clutter makes for a very rich and often necessary experience.