Loss, Clutter and Letting Go

“When we hesitate in being direct, we unknowingly slip something on, some added layer of protection that keeps us from feeling the world, and often that thin covering is the beginning of a loneliness which, if not put down, diminishes our chances of joy.” - Mark Nepo

As we said in our last blog, clutter makes you feel overwhelmed. Whenever we tell someone that we are one of the premier, professional organizers in the DFW area because we love to help people reclaim their energy, people relate.

Many say they are exhausted, overwhelmed and defined by clutter.

Clutter takes up their energy and brain space, yet they have no idea where to start the decluttering process. They feel clutter drains them, which is true. It absolutely affects their mental health, as well.

This is especially true for those going through a transitional period.

Transitional periods can include those periods of time when you become an empty nester, go through a divorce, become widowed, or are downsizing. Changes often come with a sense of loss: loss of a loved-one, loss of children going off to school, loss of an idea that never came to fruition. Yet, in these transitional periods, there is a great deal of opportunity. We can find a new sense of purpose, explore, make new friends, and travel.

Even happy transitions cause some discomfort.

Newly married couples have an adjustment period, for example. Transitions can cause feelings of joy, but also feelings of stress. At The Uncluttered Life, we have worked with people in the DFW area, and virtually through online help sessions, who have experienced both. It is our job to hold space for our clients to experience change, no matter how hard, uncomfortable, or stressful it may be. Although we are not therapists or psychologists, we think of ourselves as space holders. We give you time and space to process. We give you a place to grow. And, to grieve the loss of something, no matter what it may be.

During transition periods it’s important that we look below the surface, to help see the meaning in an object and its silver lining. Transitions and transition periods alert us to this and teach us the value of love and life. As professional organizers, we often work with people during these periods of transitions to evaluate what they decide to keep and what they’d like to let go.

An example of joy and sadness as experienced by one client.

Working with a client who had recently lost her best friend showed us that even in very small things, like a sweater, there can be a reservoir of emotion. In this situation, going through a closet and finding a pink sweater brought tears to our client’s eyes. This sweater had been her best friend’s, and her friend’s family had gifted it to our client after her death. This sweater did not “spark joy,” it actually “sparked sadness.” But there was great joy in her memory and for this reason, our client decided to keep it. We added this sweater to her sentimental box to honor their seventy-year friendship of love and devotion.

Grief and decluttering.

While grief is only one aspect of loss, it is a difficult one to process. It stays with us and keeps us from being able to move on. Decluttering helps us come to terms with difficult emotions because we sort through our emotions as we sort through our belongings. We believe decluttering after loss is not just getting rid of things, it’s processing emotions and letting them go.

“No matter how wonderful things used to be, we cannot live in the past. The joy and excitement we feel here and now are more important.” - Marie Kondo

A Joyful Present - Celebrate Your Life

Tidying sentimental items is a tall order — but doing so makes it easier to live more fully in the present. By asking what sparks joy, we honor how we feel here and now rather than dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. Approach this category with an understanding that, by organizing these mementos and sentimental items, you will feel more grounded in the life you’ve built — a life that is worth celebrating.

We hold space for change.

As professional organizers in the Dallas/Fort Worth area, we have experienced these kinds of challenges, loss being something different for everyone it touches.